Out of Place

I never feel more Country Mouse than when I am standing at the counter of a fancy coffee place. (And by fancy coffee place, I mean anyplace that isn't our beloved local coffee shop.)

But I have carried around two Starbucks gift cards around in my wallet for years. Today, with no free breakfast at the Priceline GENIUS's luxurious find because the place is just that fancy (woohoo!), I bit the bullet and handed over the cards.

At this point I realize I'm not even sophisticated enough to order. I know I'm the last one to the party when it comes to complaining about made-up names for caffeinated drink sizes, but I have no idea. Do the cool kids really call it a venti? Or do insiders just say "large"?

"One laa..venti coffee, and a venti cappucino."

"Okay, and that leaves you with $19.01 on this card," the cheerful young cashier told me. Or maybe he wasn't a cashier. Maybe he was a barista. Did I need to tip him? Was this a place where tipping would be gauche ?

I took my two enormous...I mean venti...cups of deliciousness and slunk out the door. At least there's one silver lining here. At the prices for coffee here, $19.01 will only last about two more trips.

Squeak.