I Can See Clearly Now

You may think this blog is only a repository of stories about my inability to cook, or stories that embarrass my children, or oversharing about my eyebrows. No, this site is much more than that.

When I started Empty Nest Feathers I was determined to Keep It Real, where "real" means sharing the good and the bad, the ups and the downs, the ins and the outs of moving out of the child-rearing stage of life. And oh, have I documented the good/ups/ins. My Boys!  I loooove them! They are woooonderful! Husband! So swell! Father and siblings! Best ever! Friends! Superb! Et cetera, ad nauseum.

The past few days have reminded me that this stage of life also has downs, or at least one down.

The body! Aging at warp speed!

Sunday morning I leaned down to pick something off the floor, and when I stood up I saw a flash of light in the corner of my right eye. Huh. Well, that was weird. Later, when I bent down to tie my shoes, the flash happened again, this time accompanied by a dark line at the edge of my peripheral vision.

(A word to the wise: If you are going to Google "flashing light in peripheral vision," wait until a day when doctors' offices are open. Doing this on Sunday will not add rest to your day of rest.)

Monday morning bright and early I called my doctor, as Dr. Internet urged. Dr. B took a look then referred me on to Dr. G, my eye doctor, who dilated my pupils to the size of pancakes and took a look inside. I'm quite sure that at the diameter of dilation reached she could see my appendix, but she was pleased with what she saw.

The good news is that I am fine. Take a moment with me and enjoy the relief.

The bad news is that I am getting old. Dr. G did not mince words. In fact the phrase "as we age" peppered our conversation so liberally that I thought perhaps she had chosen this as her new branding slogan. As we age, it turns our, the liquid that keeps the eyeball round and squishy starts to dry out. (It is labeled vitreous humour in the illustration--hahahaha!) For some of us, as we age, this liquid becomes more and more jelly-like until it pulls on the retina when the eyeball changes position. So as we age, some of us are more prone to retinal tears because our eyeballs are PULLING THEMSELVES APART.

So, Dr. G, what can I do to prevent this happening? I rather like being able to see. Dr. G looked at me thoughtfully. She had thoroughly described the conditions under which I should call her immediately (sudden burst of floaters, impression of a curtain being drawn across my vision) and probably thought I was being just a touch hypochondriacal. (Who, me?)

"Well," she said slowly, "first of all, no boxing. Also, no gymnastics."

It's a shame, really. I had almost perfected my triple-back-somersault-with-full-kick-out.

As I age, though, perhaps I should cut back on the eye-rolling.