How I Know the Boys (Minus One) Are Home

1. The leaves are back in the table.

2. The washing machine is running.

3. The telephone is ringing. (It's not for me.)

4. Someone's at the door. (Ditto.)

5. The refrigerator is full.

6. Whoops, the refrigerator is empty.

7. We're deeply mourning basketball losses.

8. The toilet seat is up.

9. Someone says, "It's a good thing that you two, who are the weirdest people in the universe, found each other. What a cute couple."

10. I'm grinning ear to ear.