Smart. Aleck.

Husband and I are off to the nation's capital today, where I am attending a conference and he is the trailing spouse who will be sleeping late and reading books while I attend seminars. (Something is wrong with this picture.) This provoked the following instant-message exchange with Boy#1, who is now living in the self-same capital:

One: You all packed?

MomQueenBee: Not even started. I think I'm in denial that I'm leaving for the better part of a week in just a few hours.

One: That's the best plan.

MQB: I keep thinking "I'm going to see One!" and not "My other children need to eat!" or "My flowers need to be watered and will probably die!"

One: Your other children can fend for themselves. So can the flowers.

MQB: Yes, and no. Am I a bad mother that I'm worried about the flowers and dog more than I am about my own offspring?

One: Naw.

MQB: That's a relief.

One: Well, let me rephrase. You're a bad mother for many other reasons.

MQB: WHAT?

One: But those aren't near the top of the list.

MQB: Hahaha. Ha. Haha.

One: Not funny?

MQB: Only marginally.

He may have to pick up his own tab when we take him out for his birthday.