Please Excuse Any Typos

I am not myself right now. I've just had my vision checked, and my eyes dilated for the first time IN MY LIFE, and instead of being myself I am this person:

Hello! It's good to see you! Would you please turn off the lights?

The doctor says that in three to six hours I will look much less as if I had ingested something illegal. Until then, I think I'll take a nap and dream of my stylin' new glasses.