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That is probably a conservative estimate, especially for someone whose name is only about an eighth of an inch off the center line of middle-of-the-road, but believe me when I say that pretty much no one can reliably spell it correctly without my help. My first name is actually quite common but its spelling is one of two accepted variants, and if I'm being perfectly honest, probably the less common variant. I grew up with a surname with one tricky option, and married into a surname that I've seen misspelled at least a half dozen different ways. It's as if my name were Betty Davies (it's not). That's not what you think of when you hear the name spoken.
That's why I was just a tad surprised when I opened the email from the Hampton Inn Meridian at 11 p.m. Saturday night.
"See you soon, Betty Davies!" it gushed. "Your reservation for Mar-11-2023 has been confirmed!"
Hey! Good for them! They spelled my name exactly right! But if you check your calendar you'll see that last Saturday was March 11, and at 11 p.m. I was in my nightgown multiple states away from Meridian, Mississippi. Also, the reservation was for two adults and two children and unless we've entered the multiple-universe world of Oscar-winning movies there was no way Husband and I would be multiple states away from the office with corporate tax deadline only four days in the future. Also, our children have pretty much passed the days of sharing hotel rooms with their parents.
So Husband, who was (shockingly) working on a tax return in the next room, heard my shriek:
"Oh, no! My credit card has been hacked!"
One of the best things about being married to a CPA is that he's dealt with a lot of Stuff when it comes to all things financial, so he checked my credit card online while I fretted and paced. No charges had shown up, so he called the card company to make sure.
"If the charge hasn't shown up, this is probably a phishing scam," the nice customer service rep reassured us. "Don't click on any links."
Even though I had passed that exceedingly low test of tech savviness (no link clicking for me), I wasn't reassured.
So Husband put his phone on speaker and called the hotel number.
"Hampton Inn Meridian! How may I help you?' Husband explained to the nice lady who answered the phone that I had received a reservation confirmation, and gave her the confirmation number.
"Yes, we have that reservation, and it looks like...you're already checked in?"
That's when I shrieked the second time.
"NO! I'm not checked in! That's me, and I'm in Kansas, and I'm not in a hotel in Mississippi!"
The poor clerk was non-plussed.
"But you used your credit card and checked in. And the room is paid for. And you're here."
Husband made shushing gestures at me and began asking questions she couldn't answer. What was the home address of the people in the room? What was the credit card number?
Finally she told us that the credit card was a MasterCard, and the last four digits were XXXX, which isn't a card owned by any of us folks in the House on the Corner.
"Well," she speculated, "maybe there's just someone else out there named Betty Davies."
I corrected her firmly.
"There's only one MomQueenBee, and that Bee is in Kansas in her nightgown at this very moment."
Bless her, the clerk told us she'd check into the issue and call us back.
An hour later she called back with the astounding news that there is someone else out there named Betty Davies, with the exact same tricky spelling variations of my first and last names.
"I checked her ID," she told Husband, "and it definitely matches the credit card."
Well, I'll be darned. The next morning Husband handed me a stack of papers printed out from one of those internet people searchers.
Not only does one Betty Davies live in the House on the Corner (me), another Betty Davies lives in New York, and another Betty Davies lives in Georgia, and another Betty Davies lives in Indiana, and another Betty Davies lives in New Jersey. The Betty Davies who lives in the House on the Corner (me) actually has two nearly-identical listings in this report. And the more-common spelling of the first name plus the correct spelling of the surname show up in Florida, Wisconsin, Virginia, Illinois, Michigan, South Carolina, and three places in New York.
While I was deeply relieved that my credit card was secure, at least for the moment, there was the slightest twinge of disappointment at how many other MomQueenBees are scattered across the country. I guess Margaret Mead was right:
I am absolutely unique, just like everybody else.
